4 October 2024
A few weeks ago marked the fall equinox. I started this post back then. In my world September was lively, sparkling with engagement, and fully enjoyable. And part way through this favorite month of mine I started looking forward to some grounded stability that October seemed to promise. While thinking about how to put this into words the nondual concepts of yin and yang came to mind. The contrasts which create the qualities in our daily existence – dark with light, fast with slow, expansion or open versus condensed or closed. My life calendar of activity seems to be playing out this pendulation. Movement and energetic momentum dissolving into stability and routine.
I’ve been interested in the natural flow of things for quite some time. And how to best align my inner rhythms with the outer world – specifically the natural world. I think about it as returning to a rhythm of living that is less influenced by culture (hustle) and society (repression) and more by something bigger than myself.
I also wrote that last paragraph weeks ago. And prior to the devastation witnessed in the wake of Hurricane Helene. I sit here now with a tender and broken heart. While I can’t deny there is some deep listening to be done when tragedy strikes, I feel like I need a moment to catch my breath. So many people from my former home of Western North Carolina have been injured, rendered homeless, or worse during the course of this superlatively massive storm.
And so my words still speak to me in a place of truth. Yet what happens when I align to the natural world only to hear her screaming in what feels like a very justifiable rage. It becomes clear that just aligning with Great Mother Nature will not allow a bypassing of human culture and society – we are intimately connected.
So once again, a disclaimer, that this is not an essay on how to align oneself with a greater purpose, or an explanation on what any of these events might mean. I don’t know. I certainly feel small right now. Words or sentiments are difficult in times like this. When we are deeply listening to both our neighbors and loved ones as well as to our ecosystems, our air and our trees, it is challenging to make sense of the suffering and the chaos.
The ways I am opening to wisdom and feeling my way through the grief of it all are as follows:
- Orienting myself to the present moment and what I am feeling especially in my body
- Staying awake to these feelings with a strong lean into the “both, and” – I am both sad and feeling helpless and can access parts of me who see ways to help
- When weird, challenging stuff is happening in my world I can choose rest, or choose action, or choose distraction – in addition to asking for help and looking for support. And all choices are appropriately okay.